Random Pictures

When in London

@Harrods fresh flowers 

@Covent Garden

@Science Museum

Vespa in London is a typical 2 wheel vehicle, while in Indonesia its a luxurious 2 wheels matic

When in Derawan

 beer bottle collector

 some island in Derawan.. uff I forgot what its called >.<

 Sunset in Derawan

 view from my balcony

 Kalimantan over land 

 Mangrove forest in Derawan 

Bekantan, typical monkey in Kalimantan 

 

My 33 years

So I have turned 33 last October 16th in 2014. 

What I can say about myself is that I am very lucky as a human being.

I still have a good parents, my best cook Mom.

My funny Dad

My generous Elder Sister 

My beloved little sister... 

My cute nephew and niece 

Long distance boyfriend.. well if I may say he is my boyfriend... we somehow attached to each other in funny weird way. 

a good job with multinational company

friendly colleagues 

good income 

good relations with surrounds me

I lost 14 kg 

I am looking good 

I work out a lot 

Free work out place at Life Spa (benefit from work)

I eat healthier food (which my beloved Mom provide)

I went to travel abroad, to Europe for the first time this year in London, UK. 

last year was Japan and Hong Kong 

I still ride my cool motorbike, Vespa 

I have SGD1000 presents from my elder sister for my birthday 

some cool friends I never meet anymore.. 

but did I ever grateful for all of this?

do I ever feel happy?

I have no freaking idea.. 

I am not a very grateful person. 

I am 33 yet not married, no children, no best friend to run to. 

I am in complete lost and no one know that.... they just see me from the outside..

I have never been completely honest with myself...

I am loners.. I am lonely and that makes me really sad.. 

What is wrong with me and relationship ?

 

There was one time a guy, acquittance form my mom's friend... but I turned him down.. sorry... 

In the end.. I am just an unhappy individual... 

When in Japan 2013

When I went back to Japan in 2013, I made some memorable capture. 

I miss this place so much... wish I could turn back the time... 

Japan

Looking at my pictures when i was in japan so nostalgic.
I can see how happy i was back then.
Perhaps my happiness is right there.
So i am going to search one more time.
Dear God, if this is the sign of Your answer to me.
Please help me to strengthen my will that i really wanted to go there again.
I want to go there again.
Thank You.

I am getting sucks in managing my life

I think i really need to think really carefully of every steps and decission i take for my life.

I hv been playing my life too long and too far.

But witt this experience its a good thing for me to realise that i am not that kind of person.
And i am so glad that i have no interest in doing such things.

I want to put things all together now.

First my decission of my future.
Yes i am going to say yessss for japan.
I hope the path to go there will go smoothly as expected.

And then i want to fix my job.
Its been too long i abandoned my responsibilities.
I feel like i no longer who i am recently.

I guess thats because i am just too tired with my job.
Piles of workss. Undone business

*sigh* i am so going to fix everything from today on.

First thing first. I am going to clean my room and change my bed sheet.
And i am going to make it in real quick and neat.

I have to be who i really am. Who loves neat and clean.

Today i am going to start to become a good person.

And i am going to pray as i should do.

I have to finish all the books i planned to read.

And i am going to be serious of what i am doing from now on.

Next week i will hv my leave and i am going to show my little sister that i love her so much and i want her to see me as her real sister and the good one.

I am going to be Me again.

Happy sunday! !